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WORDS THAT WOBBLE

3/26/2013

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"Back of every creation, supporting it like an arch, is faith. Enthusiasm is nothing; it comes and goes. But if one believes, then miracles occur."
                                                                               -    Henry Miller, novelist/painter

"Human beings are unbelievably strong and terribly hopeful about what's going to happen next. Though everyone's faith is different, I've seen that people have faith in goodness. And whenever people get to the end of life, that goodness takes over. They believe that when they leave this world, a peace will come"
                                                                               -     Julie Freischlag, surgeon
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.... books full of words.....
OhK. Question time. What do books, poems, songs and movies have in common?
Aaaaalright! Give that girl a Freddo Frog. Yeeeees, that's right. They all contain WORDS. Words, as you are aware, are a form of communication. Different countries dots speak different languages where words can mean different things. But words are very important in our lives. In my case I have re-invented myself to create stuff. That 'stuff' is the arts, or more specifically literature, where words now define who I am.
But words are nothing if they don't have MEANING. Some words are happy, some sad. All depends on how we use them, how we want to communicate something. When we have a STORY the words become very important, no?
So in my case my STORY sorta begins in the world of the homeless. The story that has since been developing has taken even ME by surprise. I simply had no idea what I was getting myself into. At the beginning my homelessness was only going to be temporary, until i got a job. My living on the street was only temporary until I got a job. Weeell, even though I tried the job didn't happen. I had a crack at some commission only but they didn't work either. I was THDUCK (my attempt at humour meaning 'stuck').

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.....STORIES I'd rather not tell....
So the longer my foray into a world I did not want went on, the more I became entrenched into its evil clutches. The street became the beach, became the bush. The house became the car became the tent. Macca's became 'eat on the cheap' became soup kitchens. I didn't want it that way but that's just the way things panned out. I was into SURVIVE mode. Anyway, along the way I BECAME a homeless person. I was now ONE of THEM.  Welcome to hell. Get used to it Freddie!
So I did..... get used to it I mean. As you know I began to learn. I began to read. WORDS. I began to share STORIES with people just like ME. I put those stories into WORDS. Something was building in the background. The homeless environment was providing STORIES through EXPERIENCES. These experiences were feeding my CREATIVE NEED. I was doing a lot of THINKING which gave me a shot at the creativity I had decided to re-invent myself with. This THINKING was giving me IDEAS for writing, a creative event. But then the writing took on various forms. A book, poems and song writing. Even more forms have spread from there.........

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....No, not me surfing....... ART!.....
But as well as the re-invention changing my whole world, turning it upside down so to speak, there was this other problem. This new world to which I belonged, of which I was one, was made up of a lotta different classes of people. There was the drug addicts, the alcoholics and the sex workers. This provided some new STORIES. Some new WORDS were needed. Then there were the stories of the other side. The abused partners, the Co-Dependants, who were also a part of our 'family'. And then there were the street kids. More STORIES. More WORDS. And then the psychos, schitzos, and other mentally challenged who the Government doesn't know what to do with, so it throws them into 'our' basket. More STORIES. More WORDS.............
Hmmmmmm..............
Good for me............ I 'spose. I got a book out of it. And I have plenty of CONTENT for more books, BLOG thingies, poems, and probably documentaries and films. Not to mention the LYRICS for the songs. Hmmmm....... so plenty of material. Plenty of experiences. Plenty of stories.
Coooooool, huh?
Well there is a downside. Getting caught up in other peoples' emotional turmoil is a problem. Weeeell it is for me. See I'm not used to it. I have trouble dealing with other people's pain and suffering. And then, when I have to TALK about other people's GRIEF, DEVASTATION, etc., for the sake of a STORY it does something to me inside as I told you yesterday. It makes my.......

                                          .......WORDS WOBBLE !



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THE EXECUTION

3/26/2013

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"Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one."
                                                                           -    Jane Howard, novelist/writer

"If you've had an impulse to do something, and it's not totally irresponsible, why not do it? It may be just the Journey you've always needed."
                                                                           -    Timothy Hutton, actor

"It's only when we truly know that we have a limited time on Earth, and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up, that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it (were) the only one we had."
                                                                            -    Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, psychiatrist
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........ Hmmmmmmm........
We all have ideas throughout our lives, some of them brilliant. Ideas are fantastic nourishment for the soul. They get us excited, they give us a certain BELIEF. A faith in our idea(s). Ideas can become the beginning of something BIIIIG in your life. The start of a DREAM perhaps. In fact ideas are the fruit of our IMAGINATION. Our imagination takes some of our THOUGHTS, which as you know come from our MIND, and plays around with them. A bit of insight here, a bit of visualisation there, and up pops a good IDEA. This is all a part of the CREATIVE PROCESS which I have talked about many times. As you know when I decided to RE-INVENT myself, to start all over again, I decided to give whatever was left of my life, over to doing what I wanted to do. Put simply that was to CREATE, and I wasn't really sure WHAT to CREATE! I just sorta through it into the hands of the Universe, because I sure as hell didn't know how or what to do first. It began at the Library, where I am now, where I began to read books, more specifically Self-Help, Personal Development and Biographies, mainly those relating to Entrepreneurs, usually modern technology types.
Anyway after a while I started to get the hang of it. I began reading a lot of books about CREATIVITY of all things. It's amazing how many books relating to CREATIVITY there are. Then this branched out into books relating to the BRAIN and then the MIND. I was beginning to LEARN..........  

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As it turned out the CREATIVITY path I began to follow were the arts of writing, poetry, song writing and just about anything relating to those genres, including films and documentaries, story telling (kids television, which I am still working on!) and of course Social Media. Because of my situation and being reclusive, living in the bush near the beach in a tent, unknowingly I had unconsciously chosen probably the best environment I could to pursue my DREAM in relation to CREATING stuff. Apparently ALL of the great entrepreneurs and artists, creative thinkers etc, have all come up with their brilliant IDEAS during times of forced reverie, that is, times of relaxation and aloneness. And that is 'eggs actly' how it has happened to me. But again I found stuff out the hard way. A few good ideas here, a few good ideas there, was only the beginning of the creativity. Ideas are not much good to anyone really if they just stay in your head, if they just stay an idea. In my case all that I did was read. I didn't know much about what to do next. But as it turns out I had already begun my CREATIVE JOURNEY without knowing. I had thrown my desires, my NEEDS, into my sub-conscious and unconscious. And without me even knowing my little MIND was going full steam ahead. Pretty coooool when you think about it!

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....... Just Do It..... EXECUTE.....
Through my reading and gaining knowledge about all things CREATIVE it was time to get a few ideas happening. And so began the writing, without a computer, one hour a day at the Library. But an idea is not really much good to anyone if you file it in the sub-conscious or unconscious and leave it there, or forget about it. Like most ideas there will be no manifestation, no making the idea a reality. People assume wrongly that everybody else is doing it, or that it is too hard. So good idea, bad motivation. Bad passion. Bad intestinal fortitude (GUTS!). In fact in my book there is a Chapter on what I call VIPER POISON, an acronym for the ingredients you will need to cook up a nice CREATIVE recipe. We won't go into the whole lot now but the VIPER part is THE most important. These are the VIPER ingredients, the very tools you are going to need to CREATE a masterpiece:

 VISION
                                    INTESTINAL FORTITUDE
    PASSION
          EXECUTION
          RESILIENCE

 I can tell you now from my own experience that to manifest your idea you will need to work on those traits. THE most important in my opinion is the EXECUTION. So my idea to write a book after much reading and research would not have been creative if I hadn't produced the actual book. Same with the poetry. Same with the songs which I am working on the production of right at this very moment. If my dream, or my idea was just to WRITE a song, then I would have manifested the idea several times over as I have written an album full of songs. But that's no good to me or my Journey. The songs MUST create exposure for my story. Therefore I MUST have them recorded and produced, probably with me singing. It means having to have musicians 'jam' the songs the way I have constructed them. There is a lotta work in EXECUTION, like there is in doing anything worthwhile.
So, if you have an IDEA, then make it happen! Don't think it's too hard, will take too long, or everybody else would have done it. You have ONE LIFE, just like me. Do something that is YOURS and YOURS ONLY. Do it before you die. Leave us all with something that you CREATED, just from an IDEA. Be like a Prison Warden...........................

Carry out THE EXECUTION.........

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THE TROUBLE WITH TALKIN'

3/25/2013

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"Faith is a mystery; it is a Journey without a map. It unfolds like a rose, sometimes tightly budded, sometimes in full bloom. When you think it has withered, it sprouts somewhere else. When you think you've got it figured out, you discover a deeper layer or a path you never knew existed. I once was lost but now I'm found. Amazing grace."
                                                                                   -     Sue Ersfield, editor, writer
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....saaaad stories to tell....
 As the Journey continues I am receiving more and more requests to do presentations. Talks, if you prefer. Sometimes I do a live performance of my poem "Dear Mister SomeOne Out-There". I like doing those because I get to do a bit of dramatic acting as a lead into the poem. I become a real life 'character'................ ME!  It's quite emotional and I have been very moved myself when the public tell me they cried throughout. Then I usually cry at them telling me that! See, I'm a big sook, a woos even, for a supposed fully grown, mature man. Damn, I wish I could stop this emotional wreckage that is holding me ransom. Every time I pray before my delivery. "Please God, just help me get through this presentation, without the big tear drop delivery". I'm sure he listens and helps me but, weeell I just haven't got it right ........... YET!  
See, I've done a lot of public speaking over the years including Corporate presentations. I am usually a very confident speaker when I know the ins and outs of the topic. Investment, property, marketing...... Yeah, I was very good. And I never ever rehearsed. No prepared speeches. I just work out what the audience wants to hear and then tell them what I know. It usually worked very well. I was good at it. I received very good feedback. In fact I was a bit of a 'gun' speaker.

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....even a story of a fallen leaf like ME...
That was when I was in the Corporate world, a lifetime ago (weeeell a few years anyway, just seems a lifetime!).
Nothing has changed as far as my ability to speak. I am still confident. I still believe in myself. But you know what dot? I'm having trouble getting through without a few tears. I'm getting better. And the feedback is very humbling. In fact it's quite amazing. When I stumble, I stop. Roll my eyes upward for help. Take a deep breath and look out at the audience. That is when I contain myself because I see members of the audience sharing a tear with me. So then, off I go again. I'm getting bettererer. When I first started I did more cryin' than talkin'. I guess y'all know why. Yep. Right. The subject matter has changed. The topic is no longer how to save money though negative gearing. It's about my addicted friend who overdosed. Or a friend who is trying to beat an addiction. It might be about other people's tragedies, and how they were able to beat the odds. But they are opportunities. For me. Opportunities to share MY feelings about the misery of life. About the triumph of the human spirit. About LIFE, not sad tales. No. I tell MY stories. The REAL STORIES. The stories I CAN TELL because, see, I AM ONE OF THE CHARACTERS in the stories. So the emotions are through the roof when I tell people the stories I know. It doesn't matter if there are several hundred or just one. I still have trouble holding back the tears. I did it again yesterday......

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....we are ALL BLESSED, every single dot.....
I uhmmmmed and aaaaahed about whether I would talk about a topic I knew I would have trouble with. It was about human tragedy which befell a couple of families. One of them was about Madonna Badger who lost her three beautiful little girls Grace, Sarah and Lilly, along with her loving Mom and Dad, in a tragic house fire back on Christmas Day 2011. I have told that same story several times along with similar other tragic stories. But I knew I would break when I had a picture of the three little girls projected. You wouldn't believe how I tried so hard to get through that story DRY. But one look and I was gone again. But the story is one of triumph as well as tragedy. It is about how Madonna was able to deliver a eulogy 10 days later and tell stories about her three little girls...... and,  and.....see I'm doing it again just typing about it. I keep seeing the picture......
Anyway I know as I head toward my Destin-ee that I will be delivering these types of presentations to MUCH bigger audiences. And I am BLESSED, as I have said sooooo many times before. I am blessed to be homeless. I am blessed to have BECOME one of the less fortunate in society. I am blessed to KNOW the people in my new world. I am blessed to be GIVEN soooo many stories, the  BAD...........FOLLOWED BY THE GOOD.
THAT is why I am BLESSED.
I AM BLESSED TO HAVE THE STORIES
I AM BLESSED TO BE A PART OF THE STORIES
I AM BLESSED TO JUST ...... weeeell, to just ..... BE. So are you.
I hope one day you can come and watch me cry................. 

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DYING TO BE BORN

3/22/2013

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" The true meaning of courage is to be afraid and then, with your knees knocking and your heart racing, to step out anyway, even when that step makes sense to nobody but you. I know that's not easy. but making a bold move is the only way to truly advance toward the grandest vision the Universe has for you"
                                                                                        -    Oprah Winfrey
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...the sun being born....
Ever been on a really good trip dot? I guess you have. Most of us have had the fortune to go on a holiday, maybe a cruise, a trip to an overseas country, or even a beautiful relaxing holiday with the family. It is soooo cooool to have a break from the busyness of work, huh? If you use your annual leave it is a great chance to unwind and recharge the batteries for the next full scale assault at the busyness of life. You know, the routine...... The work, the family, the socializing.... all that NORMAL life stuff. When you are having a reeeeaally great time and it is close to finishing, and you are close to going back to the routine, if you are anything like me you begin to be a bit SAD, depressed even, because the JOURNEY is coming to an end. You get that awful emptiness, the feeling of LOSS. The good times are over...........

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...watching my Journey???
So.... damn, drat, shoot and horror of all horrors. You take the very loooong Journey home. Everyone is pretty quiet because it's finally all over. Oh weeeell.....
Back to another year of the stuff you have to do to EARN the right to go on another one of those 'trips', one of those fun Journeys. But this time you will try to get a promotion, or even a second job to get some extra money to make it an even better trip. Hmmmmm.......
So you do....... you get the promotion........ and the extra money. WooooHoooo....... You reckon the last trip was great. Weeeell let's try this one! Coooool bananas. And so you do it all again. Unwind. Recharge the batteries. Oh what bliss! 
                                                                         Ditto
                                                       Ditto
                                                       Ditto
......... aaaand Ditto
Hmmmmmmm........ OhK.....

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...Baby Trigger in a few years when I'm BORN..
What are you doing? Sometimes the trips change or have to be cancelled because of 'stuff'. Lost the job, death or sickness, new home...... dadadada
But things get back to normal eventually, right? When they do let's do it all again and 'ditto' each trip, each journey, each year. Forever. How cooool is that?
There are stages in life where we look forward to those trips, those journeys, for different reasons. When we are kids it's the FUN. When we marry and have kids ourselves it's to make the kids happy. When we get to retirement it's to enjoy our retirement and the grandkids................ BEFORE WE DIE
So why do we do all of this 'Ditto' stuff. The routine stuff. The repeat stuff. Well the reason is because that's how we are educated. It's SOCIETY. It is just the way things are....... OhK, let's try this another way. Let's WORK BACKWARDS, like I talk about in my book called, of course "WORKING BACKWARDS". Let's get to deaded first. Now I don't want y'all to get deaded. I love you. So let's just use a bit of that VISION thingie and instead of fearing getting deaded let your MIND take over your LIFE for a bit. Your MIND CONTROLS everything you and I do. So let it THINK that you have started from being deaded and WORK BACKWARDS to being BORN.
Heading back to being BORN, huh? Hmmmm, interesting THOUGHT..
 Instead of each day going into DEBIT as we DIE, one day at a time, how about we get a CREDIT for each day, all the way back to when we had our very first day of LIFE.

Pretty weird isn't it? But we can't think like that because weeell it doesn't make sense to us.......
The reason I am telling y'all this craaaazzeee stuff is because it is ALL about THINKING, our THOUGHTS, how we conceive things TO BE.
See, I've had a bit of a change in the way I THINK, and I've decided that I'm not going to get deaded. I'm going to get BORN. I'm not going to  get SAD or DEPRESSED about finishing my trip, my Journey. I'm getting excited because each day I am heading toward getting BORN. Not 'born again' like 'born again' Christians. I'm just heading toward being BORN. It helps me with my JOURNEY. It helps me with my STEPS. It helps me educate myself through reading, through experiences, through philosophy I guess. It helps me with the way I THINK. And the way I THINK helps me with the Journey. So even as I age I am getting YOUNGER because my JOURNEY WILL NEVER END..........
So now I have something really cooool to look forward to right at the end of my journey. The house, and the cars, and the holidays just don't matter when we get deaded, d'ya think? Weeeell, they certainly won't matter when I get BORN. See life's not about material possessions, it's about how we THINK. If we can get our THOUGHTS right, material stuff just doesn't come into things anymore. And those reeeeaally cooool holidays I spoke about earlier? Weeell they won't come to an end and you won't get sad. So
GET BORN........
Hmmmmmm..........
Interesting, no?

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SINK

3/20/2013

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"I do have a core of trust that I'll figure out things and find my way. And if whatever I try is not a good experience, even that is a good experience. If something turns out badly its interesting"
                                                                            -   Julie Taymor, theater director
"We are more than we imagine ourselves to be. It's what we tell our children, our parents, our friends. But how often do we tell it to ourselves? And if we do, how often do we prove it? How often do we challenge ourselves to do something new?"
                                                                            -   Veronica Chambers, author/journalist
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....wear a floaty guys....
On two separate occasions in my life I have been in trouble in the surf to the point I thought I was gone. One was when I was in my early twenties. I was caught in a 'rip' which took me right out into the ocean. There were no life guards around as it was a cool day with only a couple surfing. Another time was a few years ago when I was 'dumped' by a big wave when I wasn't watching. It was only that I was such a strong swimmer that I survived, and only just. You always remember those times when you almost die but scrape through. On both occasions I was losing energy fighting to survive. I was sinking. Taking in water. Beginning to lose it. That IT was LIFE itself. I try not to think about those incidents because they were pretty terrifying. But good always comes out of bad. They were both BIIIIG lessons. I learned to be more careful. I learned to be more safety conscious. Since then I have been in the surf countless times and thankfully have not had any similar 'sinkings'. Lessons in life from BAD. I vividly recall the terror when I was sinking. Panic sets in and makes it worse. But I had been trained to remain calm. However they can't train you to be calm as you are heading to the ocean floor drowning with water going into your lungs. So I kept using whatever strength I had to surface and make a wave break. I was very lucky to be able to tell you this story. But GOOD will always come with BAD.

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..... oh oh ......
So let's fast forward those EXPERIENCES to about 5 years ago or so. My business ventures were failures. I was in big trouble financially. I had no income. The stress of going down was causing other problems emotionally, as tragedy and hardship manage to do. I began to SINK again. I was losing it big time. I was struggling to SURVIVE. Bad thoughts were penetrating my psyche. I withdrew from life. I became  reclusive. I was alone. SINKING........
But I was able to stay reasonably calm. I knew that GOOD EXPERIENCES come from BAD EXPERIENCES, every single time. But I also knew that I had to hang in there. I had to do what I had to do to stop sinking......
I'm still here. I survived the bad experiences. And now I have learned from those experiences. I was SINKING in all of them. Now I have many, many bad  experiences that have become good experiences. I can now SHARE those experiences. People love stories of survival. I've got plenty......

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..... see, eye survived !......
As my Journey continues my story builds. I have been asked by many people to help their family or friends out. I am not qualified to give advice to those who are suffering, weeeell not on paper anyway. But what is even better is that I can tell my story, just like I do with you guys every day with BLOG thingie. I am blessed to be able to share my experiences. If I can help just ONE suffering person by telling my story, then everything has been worth the trip. But as it turns out I am already helping several people, dots who are SINKING. That is the greatest satisfaction I can get. And the funny thing is that I'm not far off the bottom myself, still living in a tent. But I'm not SINKING, not one little bit. In fact that sinking feeling is turning into euphoria almost, the exhilaration of being able to help others through my STORY. Now THAT is sooooo coooool. So.......
IMAGINE what it's going to be like when I get my DOTSHQ network going. We will all be able to share our SINKING stories together.
OMG. That will be sooooo cooooool...............

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THE TROUBLE WITH TENTS

3/18/2013

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"First say to yourself what you would be: and then do what you have to"
                                                                                  -    Epictetus, philosopher

"Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome"
                                                                                  -     Arthur Ashe, tennis champion

"To fulfill a dream, to be allowed to sweat over lonely labor, to be given the chance to create, is the meat and potatoes of life"
                                                                                   -     Bette Davis, actress
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...can I just start again Mister?
I'm not happy. Not one eenie weenie teenie bit. I don't like the new La Chateau Tento location. It sucks! As far as a House and Land Package goes I have been dudded. I mean seriously, what is a poor boy 'sposed to do? Fair enough, those nice plain clothes detectives had to ask me to leave because my spot had to be rejuvenated. That's the old spot, not the new spot down south (think coastline again, not waistline!).  But see, people don't understand what I have put into that spot. I tried to have a pleasant view to wake up to in the morning and so I did that. Beautiful. Scenic views over the ocean. Puuuuurrrrrfect. Except that I had to create a bit of camouflage so that the public couldn't view me viewing, if you get the drift! OhK. I manipulated all of the little green plant thingies to grow over the top of me. Weeell, not over the top of ME eggs actly but over the top of La Chateau Tento, so that when they sent the armed forces out to look for me, a la Rambo, they couldn't find me. I did that. OhK. When the detectives enquired as to me using toilet facilities I explained that I hadn't built an ensuite as yet, they wanted to know where I.....you know..... where I..... Well I explained that for the non liquid form I used the public facilities and for the liquid variety iI used an empty milk container. I even asked if they would like to inspect IT (nooo, the milk container!). They politely refused. I mean I really had put a lot of work into that site. The bush rats were a problem, soooo big you could almost put a saddle on them and ride 'em out of town. So big they ate through the army tent like it was blue vein cheesie stuff leaving holes bigger than the entrance. The snakes liked the rats because then they could squeeze their lithe little bodies through the rat holes to come and snuggle up with me when they felt lonely. Anyway I spent all of my spare time using masking tape to cover the holes until it got to a point there was much more tape than tent. Oh yeah, lotsa work indeed.....

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....oh that poor human being....
Then of course there were the cyclones and tornadoes trying to take me out like Tornado TakeMeOut. I mean they didn't get me (YET!) but they went and snapped the support rods that held up the tent. SNAAAAAAP........ right through the roof of the residence.....
Are you starting to get a feel for the condition of my camping creation. Then of course there are the zip thingies that are supposed to prevent creepie crawlies form entering and eating you. And 'supposed to' are the appropriate words. I have had about 8 tents over the last three plus years. Maybe the zippers are only supposed to last for the length of a camping holiday, about 2 -4 weeks, d'ya think? Hmmmm.... well that seems to be as long as these door sealers seem to work. Once they go they are gone, then I try the oil, usually coconut 'cause it smells nice and I use it for moisturiser and eat it when there's nothing else. Then I try butter, margarine, then body moisturiser,  body gel (usually with a nice incense scent!). When it gets bad I use spanners, pliers, scissors, and elastic rope to try and pull the zips shut. When they get a bit old they usually don't shut but they always smell nice.......

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...betcha can't see me now....
But you know in the old location the condition of the tent wasn't great, a little worse for wear it would seem. But at least after all of the recent rain I was finally beginning to get some cover again. The camouflage was preventing sabotage, if you get the drift. OhK.....
Now I think I have given you a little bit of information for you to create a little VISION of my home. MmmmHmmmm....
Now try and use those imagination skills to picture me dismantling (did I mention the RUST!) and relocating this fine establishment. Despite all of my searching I have found a new site. Aaarrgghhmm, weeell sorta. I think finally I am running out of good sites. This new one is right next to a pile of old rubbish from a previous Hobo, but it's been a while because it's all rusty metal and decomposing bodies (no, not human, weeell not so far... ). It also sticks out a bit. Aaarrgghhmm, like a BIIIG bit. Because the support rods are snapped the "dome" is more "pole" and with the tarp over the top it blends in quite nicely with the other rubbish. I just need a directional sign pointing my way noting"Hobo On Site". Maybe even a brass band welcoming me and.... Hmmmm.......
Can't wait to ride one of the new rats though!
I think the time has come.
Building thingie here I come......... 

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RELOCATION REHASH

3/16/2013

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.... happy St. Patricks Day Irish dots!....
Sorry, haven't got time for a meaningful quote today as I have been feverishly (is that a word?) trying to relocate from the landmark La Chateau Tento's  most recent piece of dirt.
Anyway I have a new spot. Further down south. Oh, aaarrgghhmm I don't mean I have a new spot down THERE. I mean further down the coastline, not the waistline! Anyway I've found a new piece of land to rebuild La Chateau so that I can rest my weary bones after the eviction pressure and the stress assigned by the shiny 'image builder' with the cute little green handle, which upon further examination turns out to be GREY! Hmmmmm....... eyesight confirms the sad news about the state of the head!

Picture
....the new shack.....NNNOT!
So I have cleared out of the previous site but still have to do a little more cleaning to get it back to it's original pristine bush condition. I have to do that as it is the 'people's land', no?
Now as you would know from the book and BLOG thingie, I have been forced to move on many occasions due to snakes, ants, rats, cyclones, floods, police, dangerous Hobo thingies and basically anything that made Noah make the insane decision to build the Ark.
So being the budding little film maker that I am and armed with BFF's sister's  camera I  spent the morning putting together a little bit of footage showing the old place, the new place and various thingies in which I thought you might be interested. However as happens with stuff when people don't know what they are doing, I must admit I blundered, just a tad. I did this dialogue explaining my demise and reasons for the shift, throwing in a few funny TriggerDot type remarks. When it was all done I sat down in the new La Chateau Tento Mark VIII and then realized that I had shot a whole lot of great film only to note that I forgot to push the "RECORD" button...... Yep, true TriggerDot best of the best blunders.

Picture
..... of the film that was never made!...
Oh well, if at first you don't succeed.....
The new spot I expect will be temporary accomodation only. Firstly because I had to find a spot in a bit of a hurry and secondly because the 'spot down south' is a little exposed (think coastline, not waistline). Anyway if I have one of those AHA moments where I remember to turn the RECORD button ON then I will try and share some of the ups and downs in the life of a real Hobo. Secondly I am beginning to tire of the Jeremiah Johnson lifestyle and have been having nightmares about living in one of those building thingies with four walls and roof. Anyway too many big decisions in one weekend will surely result in the cracking of the green image builder with the cute little green handle that is actually grey. Oh weeell, I have to go and do coffee and cake (fish?) with BFF. If you don't hear from me for a few days it will probably because they have nabbed me again, and this time going to teach me a real lesson.........
Stay coooool dots.......

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REJUVENATION

3/14/2013

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"Mirror mirror on the wall
Whose the fairest of them all
Not you Trigger you've aged real bad
Look no more into its fantasy or it'll make you very sad

That pretty green mirror is cursed it seems
The 'image builder' hacking away at your dreams
For with that cute green handle is a reflection of a lie
If it creates that false image again I swear I will die"

                                                      -    TriggerDot in depression
Picture
......green mirror to green monster.....
Well you saw in BLOG thingie yesterday how I may have over reacted to the picture created by 'the image builder', that shiny green mirror with the cute little green handle. Well it gets worse. A lot worse.
See, here was I thinking that a few years of living in the wilderness like Jeremiah Johnson, breathing in the freshest air in the Universe, running like Scotty in John and Betty, swimming in the cleanest refreshing ocean of the Earth.....
Weeeell, seriously you'd think that such a nomadic existence would do some sorta good. You know, rejuvenate the hardened skin after over abuse by my arch enemies Uncle Stress and Auntie Pressure. You'd think night after night looking at the stars, meditating and praying..... Well I wasn't expecting to look a teenager but......
It's that damned green 'image builder'. It's cursed. Rejuvenation huh? The shock I got in the reflection of the shiny green image builder with the cute little green handle didn't end there. More shocks were to come...........

Picture
...the curse of green mirror thingie....
On return to my depression base at La Chateau Tento that evening, I had my little reading light focused on a book I am reading called "In Two Minds", a very appropriate title considering that I was suffering from the thought that I had two heads.
I had just poured a nice hot cuppa when out of nowhere the entire sand dune vegetation foresty area was lit up by two torches, seemingly more powerful than the Hubble big peroscope thingie. OMG. What now. In 'change the nappy' terror  I turned off my little torch and watched the laser light show search.... for something?????
Hmmmm, who were they? Were they after l'il 'ole MOI?
Finally, even after shining their tools of enlightenment in my direction they seemed to darken down. My little hole of camouflage appeared to have done it's job. I snickered. Then, OMG. These two piercing sheets of light hit me at the same time. Time to change my nappy! 

Picture
...you will lose your head green monster...
"Excuse me. Police here. Would you mind stepping out of the tent please?". Oh Oh. I had been made. Hmmmm......
As it turned out there had been a complaint lodged by the regulatory authority who needed to do some...... wait for it...... some REJUVENATION !
See, since Tornado Take Me Out we have had a month of non stop rain and it's made all the green stuff flourish, but apparently it needs a little TLC or something. Anyway it means I'm being shifted on somewhere??
These lovely plain clothes detectives who were extremely diplomatic about the whole affair, informed me that there needed to be some work done on the vegetation green stuff thingies around me and that I would have to move on...... immediately!
So daybreak this morning I had to relocate, or at least try to relocate. I have had to move to wherever I can lay my hat for the time being. I think this is about my 8th or 9th shift for various reasons. Bit of a pain in the butt but (butbut, butt butt, but butt!) my journey is coming to a head pretty soon with songs and media attention so I'm not too worried. I did a bit of filming for later on so you will all be able to have a good laugh at my ups and downs.
In the meantime I have to do a lot of THINKING about my own REJUVENATION. That shiny green image builder with the cute little green handle has done a lot more damage than shattering my confidence with false images. The curse of the little shiny green mirror has infiltrated my psyche and joined force with the evil NEGOBS to test my endurance once again.
NOTHING can stop me little GREEN MONSTER. Not even the dirty nappies and the continued attempt to defame my very BEING through the display of false images.
YOU CANNOT DEFEAT ME YOU SOON TO BE CRACKED GREEN VOMIT! 

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MIRROR IMAGE

3/13/2013

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"Faith helps us approach life with a sense of  possibility rather than foreboding and helplessness. it dares us to imagine what we might be capable of. it enables us to reach for what we don't yet know with a measure of courage. It gives us resilience in times of difficulty, and the ability to respond to challenges without feeling trapped. My own faith has taught me that whatever disappointments I might meet, I can try, trust again, and love again"
                                                    -     Sharon Salzberg, Meditation teacher
Picture
...mirror, mirror on the wall....oh oh....
I've been living in La Chateau Tento for a looooong time now. I think maybe too long. See, living in the tent means 'surviving' until things get bettererer..erer. 'Survival' means having only those things you NEED. So one of the things I've been missing for a very loooong time is an ensuite. You know a sorta bathroom thingie, fully decked out with toilet, shower and mirrors.......
Aaaarrgghhh..... mirrors! OMG. Something baaaaad has happened dot. Really baaaaad. See it's like this. BFF, being the beautiful, caring, giving person that she is, bought me a few goodies she thought maybe I needed. Like some new smelly Pierre Cardin stuff, which could well be a hint. A new hat because the last one had badly decomposed from lack of detergent and water. And a brand spankin' new MIRROR. OMG.........
Let me fill you in. Being the now well credentialed bush bum that I am I haven't taken the liberty of seeing what I reeeeeally looked like for quite a while, except of course for the little shattered bit of mirror that I found in the rich rubbish bin a few years ago. This bit of cracked mirror has seen bettererer times, much..... Anyway the only reason I keep this bit of used glass is for emergencies like when I have cut myself and am down to the last litre of blood or to use as a warming device in the winter by trying to get a refection from the sun into the tent. In fact this bit of cracked mirror obviously hasn't been cleaned for a while, certainly by me and undoubtedly by the previous owners who took no delight in owning it. To say that it was dirty is akin to saying the new Pope is walking into a small legal problem!

Picture
the shock was too much
But I really have no need for mirrors of any kind. I shave by feel with cold water. If the blades are more than a month old I can usually tell they need changing by the blood on the razor. My bath/shower is the ocean and I really don't need to look at myself all dressed up in my pair of boardies and dirty T-shirt, if I happen to be going out to the local fish and chip shop for my annual social occasion. I'm sure you are starting to get the drift. Soooo... back to BFF. She personally delivers these gifts, including this beautiful forest green hand held mirror which is sooooo clean that when you look in it you have trouble working out which is the real YOU! Anyway I took my little goodies, including a Maccas brekkie (Yuuuum BFF!) back to La Chateau. With feet sticking out and hair sticking UP I was in Nirvana having my deluxe burger and coffee. Birdie was singing and it was one of those AHA moments that you will remember forever. While I was gulping down the Macca's brekkie like a crazed maniac that hadn't eaten since he was born, I looked over to the other gifts including the 'image builder', radiantly green in all it's splendour. Next to it was the cracked cesspool of a mirror thingie. I had a chuckle......

Picture
.... hard to believe, isn't it.....yep, ME!....
Then without even thinking about what could be, I picked up that pretty little mirror by it's dazzlingly shiny forest green handle. It had it's beautiful radiant green back to me. As I shoved the last bit of Maccas into my crusher mouth, I turned the mirror around and........
OMG. Aaaaarrrgghh! You know. After over 3 years putting up with a fair bit of hardship and trying times, in one fell swoop my idyllic little bush boy world was turned on it's ear. The snakes, the floods, the hunger, police, you name it, I've been able to come through relatively sane (arguably!). But one look into that beautiful shiny forest green mirror with the cute handle has changed my world........forever. For that one glance, that one look into my horror filled hazel eyes, has shown me the damage that has beset what used to be quite an attractive male desperado. Now, well I'm sorta cross between Kramer from Seinfeld and death itself. 
It's probably well worth asking for your thoughts and prayers in this time of utter devastation. I think I have sunk into the depths of depression even psychologists  themselves were unaware their patients could sink to. Before I had faith in myself. I believed I had hit my rock bottom and survived until that MOMENT, that moment where a flash of an image from a mirror with a pretty little green handle, has upended my already pathetic existence......
The hallucinations, the shakes, the frothing at the mouth, they are all testimony to a man who thought he had beaten the odds only to find that he now looks a tad worse for wear. So, all together now.....
"Hail Mary full of grace, the Lord is with Thee......."

Oh, by the way BFF, the brekkie was Yuuuuummy XOX

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IMAGINE NATION

3/12/2013

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"As much as you plan and dream and move forward in your life, you must remember that you are always acting in conjunction with the flow and energy of the Universe. You move in the direction of your goal with all the force and verve you you can muster - and then let go, releasing your plan to the power that's bigger than yourself..... Dream BIG, dream VERY BIG. Work hard, work very hard. And after you've done all you can, you stand, wait, and fully surrender."
                                                                                        -     Oprah, Hmmmmmm.......
Picture
...... IMAGINE NATION......
I think I must be the only person on the planet who hasn't watched the Oprah Show. So happens I've never been interested in talk shows. I can create problems to talk about on my OWN (Oprah Winfrey Network). But I have read a lot about her. She is one amazing, and very powerful lady. Many say that her push got Barrack into the White  House and i wouldn't doubt it for a minute. But again, she is just a dot, like you and me. She was born and she will die but in between she has pulled off a life remarkable. She has done it all by herself. But, you know, the more I read about her the more impressed I am. She is generous to the point of craaaazzeee. But she knows that she has to. It is the price she has to pay for her extraordinary life. The giving back. But the other thing is that she does a lot of it 'live', in full view of the public. She doesn't do it because she has to. No, she does it because she loves to do it. 

Picture
.... help you to IMAGINE.....
As you see from her quote above Oprah encourages every one of us to DREAM BIG, as she has done herself. She understands dreams and dreaming. She knows that dreams are the product of our IMAGINATION, which in turn is a product of our THOUGHTS, which in turn are a product of our MIND. Oprah understands the relationship between her dreams and her Universe (God). But while being the single most powerful television host in the world, she uses her IMAGINATION to keep her shows interesting. Doing that for over 20 years is mind boggling. She has shown the most powerful nation on earth how to IMAGINE, how to DREAM. She doesn't ra-ra about herself and she says her secret to success is that every single dot that watches her, empathizes with her. In other words, they believe that she is just 'one of them'. She came from the slums and she has done the hard yards. Therefore she has the credibility with the millions of loyal fans who share her life. 

Picture
.......IMAGINE THAT.....
John Lennon, one of the genius Beatles sang a song called 'Imagine', which has been voted the most influential song of our time in some polls. John Lennon's VISION in creating that song way back when, is simply awesome. What he sang about then still applies today and we should all be chasing what he 'imagined'. Every single one of us has the ability to change our lives and to change the lives of others, just like Oprah, just like John Lennon. As I have said soooo many times before all we need to do is find Mister SomeOne Out-There who has been knocking inside us wanting to come out and share our GIFTS of life. One of those GIFTS is IMAGINATION. Our imagination will help us build our dreams. When we have our dreams sorted out we then know where we are heading. We have direction. Our dreams are the intersection of what we love to do, and what we are capable of doing. Pretty simple really. If you follow those directions your dreams will come true. 
I'm doing it. And I'm doing it BACKWARDS so I can show you all that anything can be done through your gifts from MSOT. So even if life's good, there is something you want to achieve deep down. So do it. All it requires is a little IMAGINATION.........
So all you need to do is find the gifts inside you. One of them will be Imagination because everybody is given this wonderful gift but very few use it or take advantage of it........

                                               .........IMAGINE THAT.......... 

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