"I was born
I will die
In between
Is the reason why"
Well, I like it!
....so not like this anymore...
Remember Bob Dylans Ghost dot? Well he paid me a visit this week. He came, he went and then he came back in the early hours of this morning. Let me tell you how it happened. One of those sorta fuuuunneeee days.
My BFF bought me some yummies to eat in La Chateau. She does it quite often and I have a little party in the tent, me and all my 'friends'.......NOT! Anyway I had sun dried tomatoes, stuffed olives, chockie almonds. Put ma little torch on and settled down to a new book about the frustration of a big Journey like mine. Ripper (great) read. While I was in eighth heaven (I'm reclusive remember, everybody else is in seventh....) stuffing yummies in quicker than a pre Biggest Loser, the phone goes. I had to stop shoving food for a minnie. It was my mate Red. If you haven't read my book Red was a volunteer that I met at Rosies and we have become good friends and worked together in her MOT Club, an acting, singing arty type of Club for desperates like me. Anyway Red has had a bit of a baaaad run with life in the last few years. Shes had major surgery on her heart, both breasts off and has terminal bone cancer. Then her three stunning daughters had a bad gene which dramatically increases the chances of breast cancer so two of them have had their breasts removed and rebuilt, pretty dramatic in itself. The youngest who is only 34 and a Miss World then out of nowhere got ovarian cancer and was not well at all last year having just about all her insides removed. Fortunately she has come through it all OK. Red of course, with her 'experience' in these things has been the LIGHT of the family.Then last night she tells me that she is a 'bit' exhausted caring for her husband who has liver cancer and about a month to live. I pointed out how good she sounded considering. She questioned 'considering what?' and I responded with 'you are a very sick woman yourself'. She jumped me with "No, I'm fine, nothing wrong with me. Oh now and again I have to put a morphine patch on but I'm just fine!!!!!! (Red I've seen the X-Rays!). An amazing woman the likes I have never met before. FAITH. Pure simple BELIEF in herself and in GOD.
My BFF bought me some yummies to eat in La Chateau. She does it quite often and I have a little party in the tent, me and all my 'friends'.......NOT! Anyway I had sun dried tomatoes, stuffed olives, chockie almonds. Put ma little torch on and settled down to a new book about the frustration of a big Journey like mine. Ripper (great) read. While I was in eighth heaven (I'm reclusive remember, everybody else is in seventh....) stuffing yummies in quicker than a pre Biggest Loser, the phone goes. I had to stop shoving food for a minnie. It was my mate Red. If you haven't read my book Red was a volunteer that I met at Rosies and we have become good friends and worked together in her MOT Club, an acting, singing arty type of Club for desperates like me. Anyway Red has had a bit of a baaaad run with life in the last few years. Shes had major surgery on her heart, both breasts off and has terminal bone cancer. Then her three stunning daughters had a bad gene which dramatically increases the chances of breast cancer so two of them have had their breasts removed and rebuilt, pretty dramatic in itself. The youngest who is only 34 and a Miss World then out of nowhere got ovarian cancer and was not well at all last year having just about all her insides removed. Fortunately she has come through it all OK. Red of course, with her 'experience' in these things has been the LIGHT of the family.Then last night she tells me that she is a 'bit' exhausted caring for her husband who has liver cancer and about a month to live. I pointed out how good she sounded considering. She questioned 'considering what?' and I responded with 'you are a very sick woman yourself'. She jumped me with "No, I'm fine, nothing wrong with me. Oh now and again I have to put a morphine patch on but I'm just fine!!!!!! (Red I've seen the X-Rays!). An amazing woman the likes I have never met before. FAITH. Pure simple BELIEF in herself and in GOD.
...DRIP....DRIP....DRIP....
So after that call (she had to go clean up, if you get the drift!) my yummies didn't taste quite as good. Light off. A billion tosses, a trillion turns and I finally nodded off. Then..........
DRIP..... DRIP..... DRIP..... DRIP....... I awoke with a fright and biiiig droplets of de'leau bouncing off my forehead. What the......
Huuuuge downpour. After the tornado a week before I had to do a bit of repair work shifting tarps and stuff. Obviously I didn't do a very good job. I reached for trusty torch which snuggles into me of a night. Quick flick of the switch....
Oh...... Oh dear. No light. DRIP, the Grim Reaper of water supply, had got trusty as well. Hmmmm....... Weeell I wasn't going out into the rain and I couldn't read ma new book. So...... void..... nothingness..... the dark.... the abyss..... So I did what I have become very good at. I meditated. Cut out all of the baaad stuff and concentrated on the sound of the waves. Still couldn't sleep though. So I did the next best thing. THINK TIME. Guess what? The ghost of Bob Dylan started singing to me. Serious. I have this really cooool song (called "I Am Your Mind") to finish off from earlier in the week. Time to shove in a few more yummies to celebrate. Rain stopped. Smile. Nigh nighs......
DRIP..... DRIP..... DRIP..... DRIP....... I awoke with a fright and biiiig droplets of de'leau bouncing off my forehead. What the......
Huuuuge downpour. After the tornado a week before I had to do a bit of repair work shifting tarps and stuff. Obviously I didn't do a very good job. I reached for trusty torch which snuggles into me of a night. Quick flick of the switch....
Oh...... Oh dear. No light. DRIP, the Grim Reaper of water supply, had got trusty as well. Hmmmm....... Weeell I wasn't going out into the rain and I couldn't read ma new book. So...... void..... nothingness..... the dark.... the abyss..... So I did what I have become very good at. I meditated. Cut out all of the baaad stuff and concentrated on the sound of the waves. Still couldn't sleep though. So I did the next best thing. THINK TIME. Guess what? The ghost of Bob Dylan started singing to me. Serious. I have this really cooool song (called "I Am Your Mind") to finish off from earlier in the week. Time to shove in a few more yummies to celebrate. Rain stopped. Smile. Nigh nighs......
....an old photo of me and ma girl.....
It's why La Chateau Tento is soooo important to me. Even the book I am currently reading refers to the 'reverie' most creative legends have needed prior to the big discovery, the new idea, the new works. IT works and it's proving to be the case with me. The lesson in all of this drama is this. ..IT HAPPENS. Baaad stuff won't go away. NEGOBS will haunt us until our last breath. It's called life. But you can change the finish of the story if you want to. Just picture how you want it to finish. Keep the vision in your head and Work Backwards. See, simple.........
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