"
TriggerDot
  • Trigger's BLOG
  • Home/About
  • The Journey
  • Working Backwards
  • Native To Creative
  • DotsHQ
  • Steps
  • Contact

JUST NOT FAIR

2/17/2013

0 Comments

 
"As far as I am concerned, the greatest suffering is to feel alone, unwanted, unloved"

                                                                 -     Mother Teresa

Picture
....smell the life in it....
There's some stuff I gotta get out of my system. That's why the blog yesterday. I live in a tent. My MIND plays tricks on me when I am alone. I can handle just about anything but I cry too much nowadays and I have to try and harden up a bit. I keep things in when I know I need to get them out. So this is my way 'out'. A bit of self-therapy.
I had a friend called Matty. I met him at a Soup Kitchen one Friday night. He was with all of the street kids. They were all drunk but behaving. I kept as far away as I could because my life was bad enough. I didn't want to complicate it by hangin' with negativity in any form.
Then all of a sudden the 'Happy Birthday' song started. Apparently it was Matty's birthday. The Rosies volunteers got a little fairy cake and found a candle, lit it, and wished Matty a happy birthday. Matty was popular with everyone on the streets. The street kids were having a good time. I joined in the celebrations and sang along with them. I hadn't met Matty but a few minutes later this guy got up. He was terribly drunk and staggered. I laughed. I had been in his position before. Matty looked pretty young, mid-thirties or so. He was good looking and had a good bod. 
Matty saw me singing and made a bee line for me. He stuck out his hand to me and said 'thanks mate', I'm Matty'. I'll never forget his smile that night. He went back to the street kids and had fun. 

Picture
....the WHY in the SKY.....
From that night on I became Matty's friend. Although we didn't 'hang' together we had a warm respect for each other. Matty was always drunk, didn't matter what time. He would fall asleep in the garden bed outside the library and see me as I was walking in. No matter what condition he was in he came over to me. He used to make me laugh with his 'stories'. A bit of a ladies man was our Matty, or so he told me. He kept asking me to have a drink with him and his best mate Scotty. They were like 'Tweedledee and Tweedledum'. I never went drinking with them but I wish I had. I used to see them day in day out at the Soup Kitchens. Matty always had a chat. He made me laugh. He had great people skills. He was a magnet to everyone, including the volunteers. I had big plans for him when I got back from the brink myself.

Picture
...see you soon Matty....but not yet...
One day at one of the other Soup Kitchens I saw Matty in line for his food. I went up to him and said jokingly that I was worried about him. He asked why. "You're sober" I said. We both cracked up. After our feed Matty and I sat on the steps outside the Soup Kitchen...... for 2 hours we chatted. He told me he had shifted into a little flat. He was sooooo proud. He also talked about his two kids and his mum and dad. He said it was time for him to straighten out and he was trying. The fact it was the first time I had seen him sober was testimony to that. He was soooo proud that he had a permanent place off the streets, and he asked me to come around and have a swim and a 'cuppa'. I said I would in a few days. I also told him I really wanted him to sober up because I could use his skills in my new business when I got going again, if he could stay sober. We bid farewell and I promised I would come over and see his new 'joint' in a few days...............

......... I was nearly at Church on Sunday morning. It was raining. The phone rang. It was another homeless person that new I was Matty's friend. He told me they had found Matty's body the night before, not in his new dig. Matty had overdosed. It was only two days after I spoke to him. It didn't make sense. But then again nothing does on the streets. I went to mass and I prayed for him. And I cried for him. Matty was ME. Matty was YOU, maybe not now but in another time. He was a great person with a problem. We all have problems.
Matty's good friend Scott lost his only real mate. He had trouble coping. He became very lonely without Matty to drink with. They found his body a few months later. It's........

                                            ......JUST NOT FAIR......

I keep crying. I am now. The streets makes me cry. And I'm going to tell everybody why I cry. Matty was ME. Matty was YOU. Remember his story. Make it mean something.
                                                   R.I.P Scotty
                                                   R.I.P Matty. I miss you......



0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    Trigger is on his comeback journey, and it's a very BIG one. Like a gripping suspense thriller, watch Trigger's life unfold in front of you.

    Archives

    October 2014
    September 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    October 2012
    September 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    April 2012
    January 2012

    Categories

    All
    Steps
    The Journey
    Working Backwards

    RSS Feed


Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.